How To Fall Asleep

I'm not a doctor. This is not medical advice. In fact, this is possibly the stupidest post I've ever written.

The Problem

I usually have no trouble falling asleep. But sometimes I do. This is how I fix it.

I have no idea if this will work for your body and brain. I can only speculate why it works for mine. But it does, consistently.

Give Yourself Three Moves

Stop tossing and turning. Whatever position you're in when you remember this method, be still.

This is your default behavior for the rest of the night. No moving. Not even fingers or toes.

Now, allocate yourself three "toss and turn" charges. You can use a charge to scratch an itch, or reposition yourself, or get up and use the bathroom, or flip your pillow over or whatever.

You can also batch any number of movements into one charge if they're simultaneous or in immediate sequence. Like you can flip over and also scratch your leg and pop your knuckles, and those together can use only one charge, if done at the same time or without stopping movement between them.

Just no pausing between actions to settle or "test out" your change. Once you stop moving, the charge is consumed.

There is no movement too small to consume a charge. Even a simple neck turn or finger unfurl must consume a charge (or be batched into a set of movements that consumes a charge).

You must commit to yourself that once you are out of charges, you will stay still for the rest of the night.

That's it.

The Effect

Reading this part is optional. If you want to go in blind, stop reading and just try out the instructions above.

Knowing you only have three chances to get comfortable, you will plan and save your charges. For example, you'll defer scratching an itch because you expect another one will pop up that you can wipe out in the same batch.

But then something miraculous happens—the itch goes away. It wasn't a real itch after all, your body was just being whiny. Or at least that's how I conceptualize it, again I have no idea how or why this works.

I've never gotten to zero charges. I can be tossing and turning for hours, then decide to do this plan, and once I do I'm always asleep within 20 minutes and usually with 1–2 charges unused.¹

Why Does It Work?

Hell, I don't know. Maybe it's placebo. But I don't need it not to be.

My best guess is that trouble falling asleep leads to tossing and turning, but tossing and turning itself keeps you awake because it keeps your body active. So it's a vicious cycle where trying to get comfortable leads to discomfort.

Forcing yourself to stop calms your body down. Maybe. I really don't know and this is all speculation. But I thought it better to share than not.

Let me know if this works or doesn't work for you: [email protected].